The unofficial larb eatery

From Ghetto to Gourmet, from Pabst to Perignon, EatFiend is where you will find pictures of food, skateboarding, the ways of the Almighty Larb and drunken ramblings about pictures of food.

Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Larbin' it up in Phoenix

EatFiend's 50th Post
Can't believe we made it to post number 50! Thank you loyal larbs for sticking with us.
What better way to celebrate our half centennial than documenting a very classy wedding I went to with DonGately and LadyLarb.
 Say what you will about Arizona, you can't beat the beauty of the desert. Note the bug splatters on the windshield. I was driving 80-90 mph. the whole way. Makes a 5hr. drive seem like a 3 hr. drive.
 So since we left late in the evening we were concerned about the bars being closed by the time we got out there. About an hour before we got to Phoenix, we stopped for gas and I saw a Beer Oasis! I couldn't believe my eyes!
 You can bet yer ass I had to get up in that Beer-Oasis' ass!
 Later after checking into our hotel room, Mr.DonGately himslef and I stayed up 'til about 6 in the morning debating the ways of life and the stupidity of people.
 First thing in the morning, a lil' hair of the dog.
 Note my AZ. wedding attire. It was a casual event so I wore a checkered shirt (shown) with black shorts and flip-flops ( Hell no I ain't showing you that) I bought hours before the wedding.
 Stopped in a hotel bar-whatever and got some greasy chicken tenders in me. Gotta contain the hunger-demons. Afterall, I am an EatFiend.
 Got to the reception around 4p.m. and what better way for the host to cool ya down in 95 degree weather than with a troff full of beer!
 Seriously, buckets of beer laying around everywhere. It was like a dream come true.
 What's this over here?.....
 Yup, I've got the mayor hook up! This guy has known me since I was in 8th grade!
 DonGately and BossyMcBosserton wait in line.... in line for what you say?....
 A full fucking bar! Eat yer heart out Comm.NBeef, PrivateStink, Wormtits and LordBlah!
 Cocktail of the day was called a "Moscow Mule". At least thats what I thought it was called. Shit tasted good!
 The wedding itself started off close to sunset and it was very beautiful. Way to go Asher!
 Pork sliders to feed the masses. They also had chicken street tacos(not pictured) and veggie quesadilla's.
 Why is there a photo of a Vans slip-on you might ask? 'Cuz that thing was mad of cake thats why!
 Then as the hours went by with the dj blasting 80's tunes throughout the night a hotdog truck rolls up right out front to inform all of us drunken wedding patrons that the dogs were free courtesy of the bride and groom. Real classy and fun!
 They had a whole kitchen set up in there big enough for 3 workers. They had a huge variety of dogs. First you chose yer meat: chicken, beef, brat or veggie. Then you chose whatever toppings you could imagine. Varying from nacho-cheese and bacon bits to cracker-jacks and whatever else yer fiending appetite desires! 
 I'm boring so I asked for a beef dog with mustard and onions. A classic. But to my surprise it came wrapped in pita bread and was fucking delicious.
 Lots of Laguanitas 6.2% tasty ass beer.
 The drinking, eating and dancing went on into the nite and then we realized that it was almost 2a.m. Time for a beer run! This time we came across a Beer Cave.
 Mr.DonGately himself, the best-man and myself handled the beer run with the precision of a diamond cutter and the sensibility of a drunk.
 I'd say 3 12-paks between 3 Larbs will do.
 We lurked in the hotel lobby drinking for as long as we could until security asked us to move on.
 And so we did. Nothing can bring down a party if you got brews and bros!
 A long day of heavy day drinking can take it outta ya.
 But still the party must go on. This ain't show-biz. It's real life. One day, I hope to kick in yer front door with the worlds biggest party in tow.
And of course Mr.DonGately himself and I were right back where we started. Drinking by ourselves playing our favorite game: OutDrink the Moon. Bet yer ass we won.

The next morning I was so hungover mixing gin, beer and whiskey I threw up in 2 hotels and the 5 hour drive home seemed like 8 hours.

Eat
Fucking
Fiend

-Sgt.Baconator

2 comments :

  1. So Travis, now that you're wearing flip-flops, how does Cock taste?

    Commander-in-Beef

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We should ask yer mom that. I see her wearing flip flops all the time. Im pretty sure shes gobbled a few in her day.

      -Sgt.Baconator.

      Delete